Skip to main content

4 ingenious ways to get your toddler to stop whining (without bribes)

Beware: Contents are under pressure. That might describe the tiny facial expression that appears amid your toddler’s whining. While the temptation to offer a small, seemingly harmless bribe does exist, that might not be the best strategy to use. There are many tactics you can use to prevent and stop the whining that don’t constitute giving in or dealing out punishment. Some of these measures might even surprise you.

How to prevent a toddler from whining

Once toddlers start speaking in complete sentences, they learn that whining can be an effective attention-getter. In some cases, toddlers forgo the use of words, and instead, proceed to whine about something that’s difficult to comprehend. How can you prevent this from happening?

Recommended Videos

Make sure you and your partner are on the same page

To start off, you and your partner can present a united front to curtail this habit. Rather than playing ping-pong with your child (which entails the time-honored request of “Go ask…” and the other parent then redirecting the toddler back to you), both of you can create a planned response to the whining. For instance, you can ask your child to verbalize the request calmly so you can understand them.

Anticipate what will set your toddler off

Another idea is to anticipate the triggers. For instance, if you and your toddler go on an outing, you might consider not staying out too long to where it runs into naptime, bedtime, or mealtime. For young children, a consistent schedule does wonders for nipping a problem in the bud, like whining. Also, giving undivided attention before the whining happens can help.

Toddler sitting on chair covering the face
Image used with permission by copyright holder

How to get your toddler to stop whining

Nonetheless, there will be times when toddler whining occurs despite the preventive measures.

Be patient

The first and most important thing to remember is to maintain patience. If you feel like your toddler’s whining is getting hard to handle, make sure your child is safe and leave the room (not too far, though) to cool down. With that said, you might keep from reacting to the whining since your response could reinforce the behavior. At this age, you can also start explaining and modeling the act of asking for something nicely.

Redirect your toddler’s attention

Another step toward getting your toddler to stop whining is to redirect their attention to something else. For example, if your child starts whining at the store because you won’t get something off the shelf that they want, you can mention something else that gets their attention away from the object, such as, “Do you remember that we were going to play outside after we get home? What should we do?” Additionally, this tactic staves off a tantrum, especially if you follow up with “we won’t be able to play outside if you’re too busy whining.”

Why is my toddler so whiny?

In the situation of addressing a young toddler’s whining, you might run through a mental checklist similar to when your child was a baby. This involves checking for illness or injury, since whining can signal that something is terribly wrong.

Also, it’s possible your toddler is overly tired, hungry, or bored. As those needs are being addressed, you can also gently explain that whining doesn’t always help others to understand what your child wants, and they can use words to communicate their thoughts and needs.

Toddler with pacifier in the mouth
Image used with permission by copyright holder

Why do toddlers whine?

The reason behind whining is that toddlers are still honing those communication skills. They’re quickly building up their vocabulary and maybe even speaking in whole sentences. However, when they need to express a strong emotion or draw your attention to their physical or emotional pain, they still don’t have the necessary tools to do so. Thus, they get desperate and resort to whining.

Another startling reason can deal with your own reaction to the toddler whining. What if you’ve unintentionally reinforced the behavior? The answer is to avoid that strategy altogether.

Fortunately, your toddler will outgrow the whining as they further develop language and communication skills. Plus, you can curb the behavior by giving positive attention to their “nice voice” and when they learn to say “please.” — no bribes necessary. Finally, when you validate emotions and take the time to explain how to deal with them, your little one will eventually pick up on the skill of expressing feelings in a constructive manner.

Leslie Anderson
Former Digital Trends Contributor
Leslie Anderson is a freelance writer/writing coach from Roswell, N.M. She enjoys gardening, cooking, and helping students…
Gross motor skills: Your complete guide to understanding these movements in your growing child
All about gross motors skills and encouraging development in your child
Toddler boy walking around

As adults, we use gross motor skills every day without realizing it. Gross motor skills are those large movements that use the body's big muscles. Standing, walking, running, and bending over to pick up your baby are all examples of gross motor skills. Basically, gross motor skills incorporate the larger muscles of the body in the arms, legs, and torso. Gross motor skills work in conjunction with the body's skeletal muscles, bones, and nerves to achieve simple movements like waving to more complex ones like riding a bicycle.

As children develop from infancy, a lot of attention is paid to gross motor skills because developing them relates to other body functions, such as balance and hand-eye coordination, as well as body and spatial awareness. When you take your child to their well visits, you'll hear a lot about gross motor skills because they are an essential piece of your child's development, and we've got everything you need to know about developing those everyday skills we use without a thought.
Physical development

Read more
4 of the best ways to get your sleeping baby to the crib
At least there's more than one way to do this delicate task
Mother holding a sleeping baby near a crib.

Sleep is crucial for babies and their parents, but what is a tired, overwhelmed new mom or dad to do if their baby won't fall asleep in their crib? After all, there are only so many drives around the block you can do, and having them sleep in your arms is sweet until you start thinking of the endless things you'd like to do when your baby is sleeping. You cherish these bonding moments with your little one; however, you do need to get started on your to-do list. But now comes the transfer from your arms to the crib -- when your baby always wakes up. That’s the cumbersome part and every new parent faces this difficulty: Transfer sleeping baby to crib without them waking.

While there are no foolproof solutions, we’ve come up with a few suggestions that may help you successfully transfer your sleeping baby to the crib.
How to transfer a sleeping baby to the crib

Read more
Your toddler feels out of control if they are doing this
Toddler pulling hair may mean they're feeling out of control
Toddler pulling their hair

The toddler years are full of development and discovery. Naturally, all those new experiences can be a bit overwhelming for them at times. Toddlers don't always know how to process their emotions which can often lead to some behaviors you may find troubling. They can become frustrated as they try to process all this new information. They don't call them the "terrible twos" for nothing!

While temper tantrums and meltdowns come hand in hand with having a toddler, there are other behaviors that may be a sign that they're not quite feeling like themselves. If your toddler is pulling their own hair, it may be because they feel out of control, which can be completely understandable. Toddlers pulling their hair is a very common behavior and is often a form of self-soothing that helps them cope with stressful situations. If you've noticed your toddler has begun to pull their hair, there are some things you can do to help.
Is it normal for toddlers to pull their hair?

Read more