Skip to main content
  1. Home
  2. Stages

What to do when your child lies about schoolwork

By

Many children desire to be honest, yet some slip into a pattern of trying to dodge their schoolwork and covering up about it. After all, who wouldn’t want more playtime?

Nonetheless, schoolwork plays an important role in a student’s learning process. In class, it’s part of the guided practice with the teacher, and when assigned as homework, it allows your child to gain some reinforcement of skills and independent practice. Another important aspect of schoolwork is that it helps your child to build up a work ethic and self-discipline.

Recommended Videos

However, what do you do when your child or teen lies about schoolwork? Here are a few factors and some tips to think about as you navigate through this important issue.

Related

Why would children lie about schoolwork?

Mother talking with young son in living room
Ground Picture / Shutterstock

According to Matthew Rouse, Ph.D., of the Child Mind Institute, the first step toward resolving this issue is to look at why it’s occurring in the first place. At times, children who experience difficulty with grasping a new concept or skill might make up excuses to get out of doing schoolwork, but there are other factors that might affect your student’s academic performance such as:

  • Lack of motivation (common in some tween or teen phases)
  • Too many social (or electronic) distractions
  • Dislike for a particular class
  • Feeling self-conscious about asking questions

Either way, figuring out the cause behind the behavior helps parents to support their student’s academic success. Usually, the first and best step is to conference with the teacher to share insight into the matter and to work in a partnership to help your child to overcome this obstacle.

What are some other possible causes?

However, if the previously mentioned possibilities don’t apply, you and your child might be dealing with other matters that hinder progress in the classroom such as:

  • The possibility that your child has been bullied at school or online
  • Changes at school such as a staff or administration turnover, since the readjustment period for both students and faculty can strike an emotional nerve
  • Issues related to family where you might need to “check in” with your child to see how he or she is doing if there have been difficulties at home
  • Issues related directly to learning and processing information

When you dig a little deeper to rule out any other possible causes that contribute to the change in academic performance, you will rule out some if not all these causes. Also, depending on your situation, you can look to teachers, school counselors, and even your family doctor for help. Possibly, your child is having trouble hearing or seeing in the classroom, which might warrant a change of seating or an eye exam and glasses. Or you might need to enlist the help of a tutor to help with learning strategies and mastery of the skill that your child is having trouble with at the moment.

How to break the cycle of lying?

Young girl at a desk in a classroom
Image used with permission by copyright holder

If by some chance, you’ve determined that the problem is simply your child’s way of testing boundaries or expressing boredom with schoolwork, then a different course of action becomes necessary. Here are some tips to consider:

  • Recommend to the teacher a change of seating if your child is visiting with classmates instead of focusing on schoolwork
  • Change the study location at home to decrease distractions such as TV, siblings who have no homework, or a game system. For instance, your child can sit at the kitchen table while studying as you’re preparing dinner, which makes monitoring and offering assistance much easier.
  • Institute some age-appropriate consequences for lying such as loss of playtime or playdates, or other privileges.
  • Create a schoolwork log where the teacher initials each assignment after it’s been completed

So when you’re dealing with a lying child, try to remain calm, but at the same time let your child know the very second that you’re aware of the dishonesty. When you consistently ask children to “come clean” with the truth, they soon realize that simply completing the task is a lot easier than trying to come up with a story to get out of doing it. Finally, remember that this phase won’t last forever if handled right away, and your child will learn the value of being trustworthy.

Editors’ Recommendations

Topics
Leslie Anderson
Leslie Anderson
Former Digital Trends Contributor
Leslie Anderson is a freelance writer/writing coach from Roswell, N.M. She enjoys gardening, cooking, and helping students…
We love these boys’ fade haircut ideas (and your kid will, too)
From toddlers to teens, a boys' fade hairdo could be the new style your child loves
A boy with a faded haircut wearing headphones

We get so excited about all the options for haircuts for girls, that sometimes the boys' styles get overlooked. A clean, neat haircut can raise confidence and show off his adorable face, which is slowly changing into the young man he is becoming. Don't worry — no bowl cuts here, just popular and unique cuts that use the fade to bring out your child's personality. Find a boys' fade haircut to fit your child's style or go for something new to see how it fits when you give these cuts a try.
Basic boys' fade haircuts

Classic short undercut
One of the most versatile and easiest fades is the undercut. It looks cool, is easy for parents and kids to maintain, and offers a bit of flexibility in styling. If the top is shorter, you could spike it up or style it to the side if the hair is left a bit longer.
Taper fade
If your child wants something a little more basic but can look put together in just a few seconds of styling, the taper fade leaves you with a few options. It's a classic cut but with an effortless edge to it, where the fade starts at the bottom but seamlessly blends into the hair early on, leaving the rest of the head to be styled how you want.
French crop
This cut is for the child with a little more edge and personality. It's still a low-key cut with little maintenance to style it, but its endless looks are modern and fresh. Start with the classic French crop cut, and then add a high fade to the sides and back. This will give more attention to the top, which you could leave longer, slick back, or cut shorter and spiked.
Faded buzz cut
Every boy in the '90s and 2000s had a buzz cut. Now, there is a modern twist on that old military cut your child can try on. It still gives a clean look but adds a layer with the fade on the sides. If your child doesn't like to get ready in the mornings, this cut will save everyone time while still leaving him looking sharp.
The pompadour
The pompadour is such an adorable cut that dresses up any look when styled with a bit of product. Throw in a fade on the sides and back, and you have the ultimate look. The classic sweep and slick back of the pompadour clean up any kiddo, but the added fade along the edges is a fresh take.
Faded comb over
Don't worry -- no one will look older than their years with this faded comb-over look. It's a cute take on the original comb over, with the fade blending into the section that gets combed over. Add a shaved line at the part where you have the longer hair on top to the side to bring the homage home.
Faded side part
Close to the fade comb over, the faded side part works so well with kids who have a natural part on the side. It gives the natural lay of the hair a style that can be done in seconds, which is great for kids and parents, and plays off how the hair goes normally. Keep the top as short or long as you want and do a higher fade on the side of the part to allow for quick styling.
Faded mohawks

Read more
What is permissive parenting and is it a recipe for disaster?
Is permissive parenting allowing kids to rule?
Permissive parenting checked off on a parenting style checklist

Parenting and parenting styles have evolved over the years, and with it comes much controversy. Everyone has an opinion on the best way to rear children, with many being critical of styles that are opposite of their own choices. ABC's The Parent Test has put parenting styles under a microscope in a new reality show focusing on 12 families with different ways of parenting their children. Critiquing parenting styles is not a new thing, though. American psychologist Diana Baumrind studied parenting styles in the late 60s. Baumrind identified three main parenting styles: permissive, authoritarian, and authoritative. She also studied each one's impact on children.
In the '80s, Eleanor Maccoby and John Martin added a fourth parenting style -- uninvolved or neglectful. What exactly is permissive parenting, and is it right for you? Let's take a look at permissive parenting, as well as the other parenting styles considered the norm.

What is permissive parenting?

Read more
Is middle child syndrome really a thing? We’ll shed some light on this concept
If you have more than two kids, see if middle child syndrome might be lurking in your household
A group of young children at an activity table.

Every child is different, but if you have more than two children, you may find yourself wondering if middle child syndrome is really a thing. There are endless reports and studies about birth order and the various characteristics assigned to those based on where they fall in their family's lineup. While these reports typically characterize the oldest children as responsible leaders and the youngest children as indulged creatives, middle children are often labeled as the forgotten children.

While no parent wants to admit they treat any of their children differently, there does seem to be a lot of evidence to support middle child syndrome. If you have a middle child, you're one yourself, or you're wondering if you should have another child, we have information about middle child syndrome that may help shed light on the situation so you can see for yourself if you think it's true.
Is middle child syndrome really a thing?

Read more