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What is a boy mom, really?

What being a boy mom means and what social media portrays it as

A mother and son playing together.
Gustavo Fring / Pexels

Girl dad. Boy mom. What are these little nicknames given to parents based on what children they have? If you have heard the term “boy mom” but don’t quite understand what it means, or if you are one and want to learn what the deal is about being one, we can help you out with that.

We will go over what being a boy mom means in the general sense and the way social media is portraying being a boy mom in modern times. No matter what, being a boy mom can be a fun journey if you treat it as any other part of motherhood.

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Being a boy mom

Mother and son bonding.
Ivan Samkov / Pexels

Before social media, being called a boy mom was just a way to tell people you had all boys. It didn’t mean anything sinister or twisted, and there wasn’t a veiled meaning behind it. If you were a mother of boys, you were a boy mom. Boys and girls are different at various stages of life, so to let other parents know what you were going through, you would simply state you were a boy mom.

What is a boy mom?

A boy mom is simply a mother who has all sons. To take it to the extremes on social media lately, it is a mother who has all sons or has sons and daughters, but fixates on the sons. It’s almost a way to publicly announce you have a favorite child, and that it is your son.

What a mom of boys does 

In social media culture, a boy mom takes the phrase “boys will be boys” as far as they can, and then takes it further. Making excuses for their son if they hit or bite, letting their child get what they want if they cry or throw a fit, and turning their son into a little mini partner are all qualities that make up a boy mom. 

As the son grows older, the relationship dynamic shifts to where the son can’t find a woman the mother approves of, or the mother becomes overly involved in the relationship, stating it’s because she worries or cares too much.

What a boy mom should be

Mother and son reading a book together.
Vitaly Gariev / Peels

A boy mom should be just that — a mother of boys, whether or not there are daughters in the mix. A boy mom can complain about the weird smell coming from the son’s room that doesn’t seem to appear anywhere else. A boy mom can talk about how everything is covered in dirt, always. A boy mom can divulge that there are always rocks and sticks and bugs brought into the home to be shown off. But that can also mean a mom is just a mom, whose children happen to be boys. 

Being a mother of boys means talking about boogers more than you thought you would, more diving off couches, more scratches and bumps, and more dinosaur facts than you can keep track of. Yes, the bond between a mother and a son can be different than between a mother and a daughter, but no less special.

Social media’s twist

There are whole subcultures dedicated to being a girl dad or a boy mom on social media. When it used to be about how difficult it felt to potty train a boy versus a girl or how different the toys were, it’s now about how protective mothers are over their sons and how their sons growing up feels more like a relationship ending than your child getting older.

Some social media influencers have made this their whole personality, and followers have mixed feelings about it. By only posting about their sons, even if they have daughters, it puts a lot of pressure on a child and creates the illusion that only the son matters in the family.

How to navigate being a boy mom

A mom embraces her teenaged son.
Olezzo / Shutterstock

If you are a boy mom and don’t want to be labeled as playing favorites, it can feel tricky navigating this label in a world where social media rules all. Being a boy mom or a girl dad is just being a parent who has a son or a daughter. The bond is unique, and each relationship might look a little different. Focus on being the best parent you can with what you have and not so much on forcing your child to only play with trucks or do sports if they happen to be a boy.

Being a parent is hard enough these days, with social media making it look like everyone is the perfect parent, having it all together. But you can enjoy being a mother of boys without the negative connotations the social media boy mom title brings. As long as you understand being a mom boy is no different than being a mom and you just share the funny things your son does — that all children do — then you are doing just fine.

Dannielle Beardsley
Dannielle has written for various websites, online magazines, and blogs. She loves everything celebrity and her favorite…
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